Submitted by: Anthony Malibu

Learning how to get back an ex girlfriend is tough. Most people figure it out through trial and error, and end up losing a potential soulmate because they don’t know the right moves to make (or the wrong moves to avoid). If you’re trying to win back your ex, this guide will show you why everything you’ve been doing so far is probably wrong.

Want to win back your exgirlfriend? If everything you’ve been trying so far hasn’t worked, chances are you’re actually doing the opposite of what you should be. The problem is this: the feelings you get after breaking up (hurt, loneliness, longing to express your love for your ex) cause you to do things that are all counterproductive to the correct moves. And when I say correct, I mean the moves that will actually get her back. Let me show you two examples:

Example #1: The Wrong Way

Mike’s girlfriend breaks up with him. The first thing he does is beg her not to do it. She does it anyway, and then pulls awkwardly away from him. Mike goes home and mourns the relationship for the first day or so, locking himself in his room. The next day he calls his ex, trying to talk her out of ending the relationship. She refuses, but pacifies him on the phone with the “let’s be friends” speech. He takes this as a good sign, thinking if he can remain close to her he can get his ex back. So Mike makes friendly calls. He sends text-messages. He shoots his exgirlfriend daily emails, just to say “what’s up?”.

Over time, Mike’s ex-girlfriend gets annoyed by all the contact. It feels awkward to talk to him knowing that he wants her back. As much as she doesn’t want to hurt him, she knows that the constant communication is giving him the wrong idea. So she begins scaling back on it, and it becomes harder and harder to reach her. Reacting to the feeling of “losing her”, Mike starts taking desperate measures. He writes her long notes and drives over to leave them on her car… at work, school, or home. He sends her flowers, and tells her how much he loves her. He promises to change for her. None of these things work: all of them cause his ex to run in the opposite direction.

Example #2 – The Right Way

Now let’s look at Dave. His girlfriend breaks up with him also, even though he wants to continue dating her. But immediately after it happens, Dave agrees with her. “You’re right”, he nods. “This is probably the best thing for both of us, because it doesn’t seem to be working out”. Smiling and wishing her well, Dave walks away leaving his ex-girlfriend dumbstruck at what just happened. She’d expected him to be upset. She was prepared for him to try to talk her out of the break up, or let her know he still loved her. Instead, it almost seemed as if he was breaking up with

her

. His ex leaves feeling totally confused.

The next day Dave’s exgirlfriend expects to hear from him. By the time the day’s over, there are no missed calls. No emails, no text-messages… no contact whatsoever. Same thing for the next day, and the day after that. Dave’s ex begins wondering what he’s up to, where he’s at, and why he seems so completely unaffected by her breaking up with him. It’s astounding that he hasn’t at least tried to “fight for the relationship”. She starts putting feelers out, talking to friends, digging for information. A day or two later she hears that Dave’s out with friends, laughing it up, having a great time. He hasn’t asked anyone about her, he hasn’t even mentioned much about the break up at all.

Now, tell me: in which of these scenarios is the ex-girlfriend likely to re-initiate contact? Which of these ex’s is intrigued, causing their boyfriend to get back in her head? Most of all, which one is more likely to date their ex-boyfriend again? Exactly.

When it comes to getting an ex girlfriend back, Dave’s doing everything right, while Mike’s doing everything wrong. By following his heart and allowing it to rule his actions, Mike’s made some of the biggest blunders any guy could possibly make when it comes to making your ex want you back. He’s got no chance at reconciliation because he’s already shot himself in the foot. His ex might feel a little pity for him, but that’s certainly not an attractive trait girls look for in a man. She’s annoyed with him, and might even be a little bit scared. There’s no way she’ll want to contact or hear from Mike, because she knows any little thing she does can be construed by him as a sign that she wants to get back together.

Dave on the other hand, is in prime position. Although it might not seem like he cares, he wants his ex back very much. The difference is that Dave knows what NOT to do when trying to win back his girlfriend. He’s given her the space to miss him, and the time to wonder whether or not he’s moved on. His ex has to make a quick decision: do I want to continue the break up and risk losing him forever, or do I want to get back together again? Because to her, things are uncomfortable right now. It doesn’t look like Dave’s going to wait around. She might even be questioning whether she needs him more than he needs her, which is a huge step toward fixing the break up. And when she asks him back out? The whole thing will seem to be her own idea, instead of something orchestrated by her ex boyfriend.

Pushing your ex in the opposite direction is one of the best ways to lose them forever. If you’re looking to get back together with your ex, you need to know exactly the right moves to make. Moreover, you have to learn which moves NOT to make, in order to increase your chances of reconciliation. And the sooner you get started? The greater the chance you’ll succeed in getting back your girlfriend.

About the Author: There are 8 individual steps in learning how to

Get Back An Ex Girlfriend

. so be sure to learn them! And for more info on getting ANY ex back, check out

Back With Your Ex

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isnare.com

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